Funny SMS

1) Anger is quelled by compassion, enmity is quelled by friendship,
hatred is conquered by love, and sins by good conduct

2) How many times i hav to tell you to not send messages to me..
See what happened now, all the ants came 2 my cell 2 take those sweet msgs.

3) Some of the best moments in life:-
Lying in bed listening to the rain outside…
Thinking about the person you love…
A long drive on a calm road…
Finding money in your old jeans just when you need it…
Giggling over silly jokes…
Holding hands with a friend…
Getting a hug from someone who loves u…
The moment your eyes fill with tears after a big laugh…
Wishing you these moments in your life always..!

4) Dont ever be angry on ur friends, Bcoz upto the last moments of our life, what pains us is not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends!

5) Love is like
“missed call”
it stops when u try to catch,
But friendship is like
“sms”
bcoz it comes & stays inside ur inbox untill u delete it.

6) If work is carried out without being overly concerned with the result, then even failure will not hurt

7) Its a nice feelin whn sum1 u luv luvs u in return. So whn u knw d 1 u luv has special feelings 4 u, nvr let dem go coz its rare 2 find 2 hearts dat beat
as 1.

If at any time ur life is like a “candle in the wind”then i’ll put my hands around u so that all burns are mine and all light is urs. !

9) In d book cal’d life,d page ystrdy is ovr,d page future is blnk n page 2day is bin writn.So rite d best u cn,coz on dis book ur eraser jst won’t work

10) My prescription 4 u
A cute little smile 4 breakfast
More laughs 4 lunch
And lots of happiness 4 dinner
My fee ?
An extra smile whenever u think of me…….

1) Welcome the fresh morning with a “Smile” on ur “Face” , “Love” in ur “Heart” & “Good Thoughts” in ur “Mind” & U will have a Wonderful Day.
*Have a nice day*

2) SPECIAL friend
S-supports u
P-prays for u
E-encourages u
C-cares for u
I-inspires u
A-advises u
L-loves u
Hope we remain ‘Special’always.

3) A friend is a push wen u r stopped..a chat wen u r lonely..a guide wen u r searchin…a smile wen u r sad..and a song wen u r glad………..

4) LOVEis for LIFE,LIFEis not forLOVE,LOVEmay fail in LIFE,LIFEshould never fail in LOVE.
So Dnt spoil LIFEin LOVE bt dnt forget L0VE IN LIFE

5) THOUGHT FOR THE DAY :-
Good JUDGEMENT comes from experience. but Unfortunately the experience usually comes from bad judgement….!!!

6) Thought for day: be close with someone who makes you happy. But be closer to that person who cant be happy without you! Feel the difference…

7) I read in the Newspaper
that…

sending MSGs
2 friends causes Radiation..

which makes HEART-PROBLEMS & causes Cancer…

So
Aaj se
Band…

NewsPAPER
yaar.

Whenever I look at my palm, I wonder which of those tiny cute crisscross lines made me so lucky to have a sweet & nice friend like You

9) G-od
O-ffers us his
O-utstanding
D-evition to
M-ake us
O-bedient n
R-eady for a
N-ew life that
I-nspire others
N-and
G-uide us 2 bcome good human.
Good morning, hav a nice day.

10) My eyes r hurting coz i can’t c u, my arm are empty coz i can’t hold u, my lips r cold coz i can’t kiss u, my heart is breaking coz i can’t b with u!

****

1) One day man asked god whats d diff between your love & my love?
God smiled & replied: A bird in sky is my love,
& A bird in cage is ur love..

2)
Welcome the new morning with a “Smile” on ur “Face”, “Love” in ur
“Heart” “Good Thoughts” in ur “Mind” & U will have a .Wonderful Day. .Good Morning.

3) ‘WORDS FROM D PAGES OF LIFE’ Don’t care some1 to that extent that u miss the other, but care to that extent that the other doesn’t wish to lose you!

4) My sweetest memory-our meeting.! My biggest sadness-the distance.! My biggest hope-i will c u soon.! My deepest wish…Be happy always.! My small word to u
Hi”

5) Hurt a true heart in luv as much as u want,it wont stop loving u,But if u cheat a true heart,it wont hurt u,but it wont dare 2 luv u again..

6) Never try alone to take the weight of a tear that comes out of Ur heart & falls through Ur eyes, always remember that a Friend is here to share…

7) May the blessings of God harrass u, Happiness attack u wherever u go.May misery b hijacked frm u & may thieves pickpocket all ur worries…Gud morng.

Life is a continous challange .A constant struggle from up 2 down . We r not made RICH by what is in our pockets but what is in our HEARTS.

9) ”when u r lonely in the middle of night try 2 luk at a star in the sky ”who knows, though we r miles away; we may be looking at the same star..

10) F’ship is not anExam to Pass or Fail
F’ship is not a competition to Win or Lose
F’ship is a Feeling in which U care for Someone MORE THAN U.

****

*Sunday means:*

*S=Sote raho*

*U=Utho der se*

*N=Nahao mat*

*D=Dekhte raho TV*

*A=Aaram hi karo*

*Y=Yaad karo sirf humko.*

*So enjoy **ur** SUNDAY.***

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*Jis gali se tum Gujro,*

*Jis rah se tum gujro,*

*Kuch aisa kar gujro,*

*Ki har bar jab bhi gujro,*

*Har gali se awaz aye*

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*Chor.chor.chor.chor.chor.chor.***

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*Cheat and love,*

*But dont love & cheat.*

*Think and love,*

*But dont love & think.*

*Break d heart & love,*

*But dont love & break d heart.***

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*Jo sab dete hai woh hum nahin denge,*

*pyar jab bhi denge kam nahi denge.*

*Yakin na aye to aazma lena,*

*zindagi mein aapko kabhi gam nahi denge.***

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*Kash dil ki chahat kabhi na adhuri ho,*

*jise bhi tum chaho us se kabhi bhi na duri ho.*

*Mile zindagi ki har khushi aapko,*

*allah kare meri yeh dua zaroor puri ho.***

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*Jab bhi khuda se koi saugat mangege,*

*Har janam me tera sath mangege.*

*Lage na hamari dosti ko kisi ki nazar,*

*yeh dua khuda se din-raat mangege.***

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*Life is dificult,*

*full of troubls,Sorrows,pains.*

*But if u fall dwn,*

*jst stand up straight,*

*be confident*

*& say..*

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*Shukar Hai,**Kisi** Ne Dekha Nhi!***

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*Aapke liye film me baat ki hai.*

*Chhota sa role hai,*

*John Ibrahim aapko paani me le jar aha hai.*

*Film hai?.*

*”GAI BHAINS PANI ME” ***

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*As you go to bed 2nyt,*

*I begged d moon 2 keep u in sight.*

*I told angels 2 hug u tight,*

*Now 2 make sure ul b alryt,*

*I askd d wind 2 blow u my sweet gud nyt!***

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*Hum wo nahi jo matlab se yaad karte hai,*

*hum wo hai jo dil se pyar karte hai.*

*Tumhara paigam aye na aye,*

*par hum har pal intezar karte hai.***

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*Sometimes friends r 4 a moment*

*and sometimes friends r 4 lifetime.*

*Bt sometimes,a moment with a true friend*

*is enough to spend a lifetime!***

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*Khuli hai ankhe*

*tera didar karne ko,*

*dil karta hai tere ishk me*

*ik bar marne ko.***

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*Losing in life & regaining what U lost*

*makes u d most confident prsn*

*coz U are no more afraid of losing*

*as now U realise **ur** ability 2 regain.***

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*Bewafa se kabhi pyaar nahi hota*

*marne ke baad intezar nahi hota.*

*DOSTI dekhkar karna zamane mein,*

*Har insan meri tarha*

*SINCERE,SWEET aur SMART nahi hota.***

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*Geet ki zarurat mahfil me hoti hai*

*Pyar ki zarorat dil me hoti hai.*

*Bin aap jaise dosto ke adhuri hai ye zindgi*

*kyonki dosto ki zarurat har pal me hoti hai.***

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*Agr hm 1 aansu hote,*

*to aapki aankho se ho kr*

*aapke Hothon pr marna pasand krte.*

*Aur Agar tum meri aankho k aansu hote*

*to vada hai dost hm zindgi bhar na rote.*

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*Wen things go wrong*

*Wen sadness fils **ur** Heart*

*Wen tears flow in **ur** eyes*

*Always remember 3 things*

*1. I AM WITH U*

*2. WE HAVE MONEY*

*3. BAR IS OPEN.*

*LETS. GO.*

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*Ager khushi se mare to UNHE paker marenge,*

*Ager gum se mare to UNHE khokar marenge.*

*Gham hoga na koi dunia se jane ka,*

*Jaise b mare UNKE hokar marenge.***

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*To LOVE is nothing.*

*To be LOVE is something.*

*To LOVE and be LOVED*

*is everything.***

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*AAAAnchi….*

*X cuse me Plz..!*

*Apne yaad kiya?*

*So sweet.***

Dark were those days, without your sight. When I was in darkness,
you gave me light. You gave me strength to make life bright. Thank
you so much PHILIPS TUBELIGHT.

Munna bhai: Agar bina danto ka kutta kate to kya karna chahiye?
Circuit: Simple bhai… Bina sui ka injection lagane ka!

system of love
jan..rose
feb….perpose
mar..gift
apr…lift
may….chating
jun……dating
jul…..miss you
aug….kiss you
sep…..anger
oct…..danger
nov….Left
DEC….NEXT

EXAMS are like GIRLFRIENDS:
1. Too many questions.
2. Difficult to understand.
3. Too much explaination is needed.
4. Result is always ATKT……..

Teacher to santa: where were you born?
Santa: Thiruvananthapuram
Teacher: can u spell it?
Santa (after thinking for some time): I think I was born in GOA.

Yaad hai ham pehle kahan milte the…… train ruki, khidki khuli, nazro se nazre mili aur aapne kahan,….. ALLAH KE NAAM PE KUCH DE DE BABA!!!!!!

Read each word reversely: A SUOMAF ROTCOD DLOT EM TAHT YLNO LATNEM STNEITAP EVAH EHT TNELAT OT DAER SMS NEVENEHW STI NETTIRW YLESREVER

Aisa DOSTANA hamara, Mai KASHTI tu kinara, Mai DHANUSH tu teer, Mai MATAR tu paneer, Mai VARSHA tu badal, Mai RAJMA tu chawal, Mai HOT tu cool, Mai APRIL tu….?

Hi,

How are u?
Doing nothing?
Then Make a Place,
4 Me in ur Heart!!
I May come there any time!
Ur’s Faithfully,
“HeArT aTtAcK”

4 roses, just for you!
1st for Friendship.
2nd for Wealth.
3rd for Happiness.
and the last one..
Kaan ke upar laga lena, mast lagega.

Why do Bride & Groom exchange varmaala during wedding?
To tell each other affectionately. .. Sweetheart U R Dead!

A man who surrenders when he’s WRONG, is HONEST.
A man who surrenders when he’s NOT SURE, is WISE.
A man who surrenders when he’s RIGHT, is a HUSBAND

Man receives telegram: Wife dead-should be buried or cremated?
Man: Don’t take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

Life is a paradox-what u want u don’t get(luv), what u get, u don’t njoy(marriage) , what u njoy is not permanent(galfriend ), what is permanent is boring(wife)

bandar ka bacha apni ma se bola
ma-ma main itna badsorat kyun hoon
ma boli tu to phir bhi thik hai
usko dhek jo meesage phad raha hai.

Aapke haath me mobile hai..
Chehere pe sundar c smile hai…
SMS ki achchi khasi File hai…
Phir bhi SMS nahi karte…
yaar, yeh kaun sa stupid style hai??

WHY BOYS GO TO TEMPLE ?
A: B COZ TEMPLE IS THE ONLY PLACE WHERE THEY
CAN FIND POOJA DEEPA ARATHI ARCHNA
ARADHNA JYOTHI…………. ANDMANY MORE
WHENEVER GOD IS GREAT.

“CELLO”
THE PEN OF INDIA
“LUX”
THE SOAP OF INDIA
“AMUL”
THE TASTE OF INDIA
“YOU”
THE BEST OF INDIA
“SENDER”
STAR OF INDIA……HA .. HA..

CLOSE YOUR EYES
AND THINK
ABOUT YOURSELF
FOR 30 SECONDS.
AFTER 30 SECONDS
OPEN YOUR EYES
AND YOU WILL REALIZE
THAT YOU HAVE….
WASTED 30 SECONDS…YES OR NO

JONY .. JONY.. YES PAPA..
NO SMS …WHY PAPA….
REMOVE UR SIM .. QUICK PAPA…
BREAK UR CELL ……
HA…HA….. HA…..

WHY
DO I
SMS U ?
IRRITATE ?
CARE ?
MISS ?
BORE ?
DO U KNOW Y ?
COZ UR MY FRND & I HAVE D
RITE 2 DISTUBE U ANY TIME …..

1) A beggar came 2 me: Allah k naam pe dede baba. I replied: mere pas paise nahi hai, yeh msg padnewale ko leja. Beggar: maine bheek mangi BHIKARI NAhi..

2) Yeh Jo Hai Na… Yeh Jo Haath Mein Pakda Hai…Yeh Sirf Msg Receive Karne Ke Liye Nahin Hai… Iss Se Msg Jaate Bhi Hain…Try It..!

3) I want to say a word to u!!
that’s STARTS with u…….
& ENDS With u….
and That defines U…..
“ULLU”

4) kahi andhera to kahi shaam hogi meri har khushi tere naam hogi
kuch mang ke to dekh humse ae dost bijli pani ka bill or karz me dubi proprty tere naam hogi,

5) Im very sorry yaar, I was ignoring u from last few days but now it wont happen in future, now I have understood that SAATH REHNE SE AIDS nahi failta……
happy AIDS DAY.

6) You are ABCDEFGHIJKL!
A-Adorable
B-Brilliant
C-Cute
D-Dashing
E-Exciting
F-Fantastic
G-Great
H-Humorous
I- Intelligent
JKL-Joke Kaisa Laga!

7) We spend a lot in buying more and more clothes, Forgetting that most blissfull blessed moments are enjoyed without clothes…!

Someone rightly said..It’s difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things like WOMEN and then he rudely turns them into WIFE.!!

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AAAAnchi…..
X cuse me Plz….!sorry to disturbe U

10) Chandni raat me sone se pehle
Khawbo ki duniya me khone se pehle
Maine socha tumhe yaad dila du
Maine socha tumhe ehaas dila du
Susu kar k sona.

Sardar proposed to a Girl……Girl said ‘I’m 1 year elder to you’………..
Sardar said ‘Oye No Problem Soniye, I’ll marry you NEXT YEAR.

Sardar’s wish: when i die, i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the passengers in the bus he was driving..

Postman- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver This packet to you Sardar- Why did you come so far. You could have posted it….

Sardar at an Art Gallery I suppose this horrible looking thing is What you call modern art ?
Art dealer I beg your pardon sir, that is a mirror!

Once a Sardarji was traveling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up when the station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees, the sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the mirror. Said his wife ” What’s the matter?” Replied he “The cheat on the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else”

Q: Why do Sardars always smile during lightning storms?
A: They think their picture is being taken.

Q: How did the Sardar try to kill the bird?
A: He threw it off a cliff.

A Sardarji happened to participate in a competition, which was about writing a shortest story. The organizers had put a condition that a story must have four ingredients viz. religion, sex, suspense and mystery.
Sardarji’s turn came after many attempts by others. Sardarji gave a story, which was just one sentence and read -
‘ O god, my wife is going to deliver a child’.
Ostensibly amused, the organizers asked the sardarji whether it contained all the four ingradients!!
Sardarji replied affermatively and gave his explanation as below:
O god : religion
my wife : sex
going to deliver a child : suspense (whether a girl or a boy)
‘But where is mystery?’ asked one of the organizers.
The sardar replied : who is the father???

Banta bought a brand new maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar
to Jalandhar to meet his friend Santa. He reached Jalandhar in a few hours. After spending a few days there he decided to return and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. but he didn’t reach Amritsar that evening and not even the next day. When he finally reached home on the third day his
distraught mother ran out hugged him an asked,”Arre puttar ki hoya??”
Banta got out tired and said, “Oy ye Maruti wale pagal hain, agge janne ke
leye chaar gear banaate hain aur pichche jane ke leye sirf ek!”

A Teacher lecturing on population – In India after Every 10 sec a Woman gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.

* The owner of a company tells his employees:
You worked very hard this year. The company’s profits increased
dramatically.
As a reward, I ‘ll give everyone a check for Rs 5000.
If you work with the same zeal next year, I’ll sign those checks.

* 1st thief, “Police! Quick! jump out of the window!”
2nd thief, “But this is the 13th floor”
1st: “Hurry! This is no time to be superstitious”

* Eve to Adam: Do you love me?
Adam nonchalantly: Who else?

* A Girl: At weddings old aunts used to tease me saying “You are next, you
are next.”
But they stoppd it since I started doing the same to them at funerals…! !

* Q: What did the gangster’s son tell his dad when he failed his
examination?
A: Dad they questioned me for 3 hours but I never told them anything.”

* Q: Why was math book depressed?
A: It had nothing but probs.

GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest. BOY : Then marry me
and we’ll be the happiest couple
——————————
I want to share Everything with you. Your JOYS, Your SADNESS, Your HAPPY
MOMENTS Every single second of day Let us START with your ATM Password
first.
——————————
Dating process: 6 weeks : I love U, I love U, I love U. 6 months : Of
course I love U. 6 years : GOD, if I didn’t love U, then why the hell did I
propose?
——————————
There is always a “DRIVE SLOW” board near boy’s schools, but n ot near
girl’s college.. Why? COZ vehicles automatically go slow….
——————————
History Teacher : From where to where did the mughals rule ? Student:
Sir, I am not sure but I think from page 15 to 26.
——————————
Q: What kind of food does a race horse eat? A: Fast food
——————————
hey listen she asked me u r details…so i gave her u r cell number. so
she will meet u soon…. her name is smile…. i think she came.
——————————
2day, 2morrow & 4ever, there will be 1 heart that would always beat 4 u.
U know whose?? YOUR OWN
——————————
Heartbeats are countless …. Spirits are ageless …. Dreams are
endless….. Memories are timeless…. A friend like you …….
Shameless!!!
——————————
Museum administrator: That’s a 500 year old statue you’ve broken. Banta
Singh: Thank God! I thought it was a new one!
——————————

Dream makes al things possible,
Hope makes al things work,
luv makes al thigs beutifl,
smile makes al d abv
so always BRUSH UR TEETH…!

What do u call a woman in heaven?
An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven?
A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven?
PEACE ON EARTH!

There’s only one perfect child in the world & every mother has it.
There’s only one perfect wife in the world & every neighbor has it!

Three dreams of a man:
To be as handsome as his mother thinks
To be as rich as his child believes
To have as many women as his wife suspects..

What kind of food does a race horse eat?
A: Fast food

2day, 2morrow & 4ever,
there will be 1 heart that would always beat 4 u.
U know whose??
YOUR OWN

* LARKA: AIK LARKI KO CHERTE HUWE KAHTA HAI K JAN-E-MAN IS DIL MAI A JAO.
LARKI: SANDIL UTAROO KIA?????
LARKA:JAN-E-MAN YE DIL HAI KOI MASJID NAHI SANDIL PAHAN KAR HI AJAO.

* 1980 girls: Maa mei Jeans pehanungi
Maa : Nahin beti log kya kahengey ?
2006 girls: Maa mein mini skirt pehanungi
Maa: Pehen le beti kuch to pehan le!

* Baatein karke bhola na dena,
Fasana karke mita na dena,
Agar de saka dosti to gham nahi,
Par dost banke bhola na dena.

* Wat makes sum ppl dearest is not the happiness wen u meet them,
but its the pain wen u MISS them

* Exams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya,
Kuch To Hua Hai Kuch Ho Gaya Hai,
Exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya,
Sab Kuch Alag Hai Sab Kuch Naya Hai

* Always ask god to give you what you deserve,
not what you desire.
Its bcoz your desires may be few,
but you deserves a lot!

* What’s the diff between Dava & Daru?
Dava is like girlfriend,
that comes with expiry date and Daru is like wife,
Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.

* FOOL se, FOOL ne,
FOOLon ki FOOLwari me
FOOL ke sath wish kiya ‘
You are the most beautiFOOL,
colorFOOL & wonderFOOL amongst all FOOLS

* Judge: U r crossing the limits.
Lawyer: Kaun Saala aisa kehta hai?
Judge: How dare you call me saala?
Lawyer: My Lod, I said kaun ‘Sa Law’ kehta hai?

* Bhikhari: Saab 1 rupaya de do.
Saheb: Kal aana.
Bhikhari: Saala is kal-kal ke chakkar mein is colony mein mere lakhon
rupaye fase huye hain.