Funny SMS

Valikkuthu Azhuthuduven
Namma Vadivelu ,Avar panra periya project la he is one of the Module Leader and avarukku keezhe rendu moonu peru irukkanga….

oru naal avar team mate odi varaan……
“thalaiva..thalaiva..namma code la bug pottutaanga thalaiva…”
Aavesa vadivelu veliyae varaar… “evan pottathu bug?”
“Namma testing team kattathurai thaan thalaiva…”
“Kattathurai ku coding theriyalennu ninaikkaren..athaan namma module la bug podarathae avanukku velaiya pochu.”
Vadivelu and other team members aavesama poranga Testing team ku… Vadivelu ketkarar
“Evan avan en code la bug pottathu”
Testing team Lead Kattathurai thirumbi paarkarar..
Kattathurai: “Enna sonne..seriya ketkale…pakkam vanthu sollu”
Vadivelu : Un cubicle kulla naan vara maaten… En aalai anupparen..avanukku bathil sollu
(sends in his team mate)
Team mate : Evanda enga module la bug potathu
Kattathurai becomes tense.. Vadivelu calls from behind : Deiii..
Kattathurai : Enna
Vadivelu : unaku thairiyam iruntha ippo bug podu
Kattathurai opens the Bug tracker and assigns a defect against Vadivelu’s module… A shocked vadivelu tries to escape from that place.. athukkulla the testing team surrounds him…
Vadivelu : ungalaiyellam paartha enakku siripa irukku
Kattathurai (smiles)
Vadivelu : En module la ithu varaikkum yaarum bug pottathu illa
Kattathurai : pona vaaram thaane rendu bug kandupidichu assign pannen
Vadivelu : Athu pona Build ku anupichathu..naan intha Build pathi solren
Kattathurai takes up the bug list and keep assigning bugs to Vadivelu team
Vadivelu : Venaam…. (After 2nd bug, slows down) Venaam…….. Venaam…. Valikkuthu…… Azhuthuduven…… (starts crying) Azhuthuduven…… ippave daily 9 poren…ini mel ungalala veetukke poga mudiyathapadi aayidum…. (cries)
Kattathurai : Antha periya list eduda
Vadivelu (kalavaramagi) : athu ennathu
Kattathurai : Severity number sollu maaple… As vadivelu looks in terror, Kattathurai keeps assigning lots of Sev 1 bugs to Vadivelu module
A dejected Vadivelu comes back to his cubicle… Apppo other module ppl talks among themselves..
“ivvalo bugs vanthirukke.. module nijammave romba complex ah irukum pola….sema buthisaali nu than ivarukku koduthirukkanga”
Vadivelu : ippadi usupethi vittu usupethi vitte code ah ranagalam aakidarangappa…
Vadivelu to his team mates – Yenda, innumada intha project la nammala nambaraainga

1. If time doesn’t wait for you, don’t worry!
Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!

2. Expecting the world to treat u fairly coz u r a good person is like expecting the lion not to attack u coz u r a vegetarian.
Think about it.

3. Beauty isn’t measured by outer appearance and what clothes we wear, but what we are inside.
So, try going out naked tomorrow and see the admiration!

4. Don’t walk as if you rule the world,
walk as if you don’t care who rules the world!
That’s called Attitude…! Keep on rocking!

5. Every lady hopes that her daughter will marry a better man than she did
and is convinced that her son will never find a wife as good as his father did!!!

6. He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair.
When he died, the insurance company refused the claim.
They said , he who never lived, cannot die!

7. A man threw his wife in a pond of Crocodiles?
He’s now being harassed by the Animal Rights Activists for being cruel to the Crocodiles!

8. So many options for suicide:
Poison, sleeping pills, hanging,
jumping from a building, lying on train tracks,
but we chose Marriage, slow sure!

9. Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!

10. All desirable things in life are either illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!

11. Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal Nehru
We should learn to love our enemies- Mahatma Gandhi
Ab aap bataaye kiski sune bapu di ya chacha di???

12. When things go wrong, when sadness fills your heart,
When tears flows from your eyes always say these words…
Eh Ganpat, chal daru la…

13. 10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving.
Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!

* Engineering Collegela Padichi Engineer Agalam. Aana Presidency Collegela Padichi President Aga Mudiyuma???

* Bus Stop Kitta Wait Panna Bus Varum… Full Stop Kitta Wait Panna Full Varuma???

* Airtel Mobile Vachiirundalum… Aircel Mobile Vachiirundalum… Thumumbodhu Hutch Nu Than Satham Varum

* Oorukae Kaekura Madhiri Sathama Korratai Vittalum… Un Korattaya Nee Kaekamudiyadhu….

* Gold Vachi Gold Chain Pannalam Ana Cycle Vachi Cycle Chain Panna Mudiyuma???

* Enna Than 500 Km Speedula Puyal Kathu Adhichalum, Cycleluku Pump Vachi Than Kathu Adikanum…. Enna Ulagam Idhu…

* Auto Driver Ala Auto Otta Mudiyam!!! But Screw Driverala Screw Otta Mudiyum A???

* Nee Evalo Periya Padipalliya Irundhalum Exam Hall La Poi Padikka Mudiyadhu..

* School Testla Bit Adikkalaam……… College Testla Bit Adikkalaam……. Aanna Blood Testla Bit Adikka Mudiyaadhu……..

* Enna Than Naai Nandri Ullatha Than Irunthalum?? Athala Thank You Solla Mudeyathu!!! Idhuthan Valkai

* Lunch Bagla Lunch Kondu Poha Mudiyum… But School Bagla Shoola Kondu Pohamudiyumaaaa?

* Aayiram Than Irundhalum Aayirathi Onnu Than Perusu….

End of beautiful tamil thattuvams..

Lady : So, you want to become my son-in-law? Boy: Not really, but I don’t see any other way 2 marry ur daughter!

A lady delivered twins. Suprisingly one is a boy and another is a dog how it is possible? Bcoz her husband is HUTCH DEALER…. wherever u go out network follows

Dream makes al things possible, Hope makes al things work, luv makes al thigs beutifl, smile makes al d abv so always BRUSH UR TEETH…!

Husband: Today is sunday & I have to enjoy it. So i bought 3 movie tickets. Wife: why three? Husband: 4 u and ur parents.

A police recruit was asked during exam, “What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?” He said, “Call for backup.”

A baby monkey asks his father, Father why r we so ugly? The father says to him, don’t stress my son u should see the one who is reading this!!

What do u call a woman in heaven? An Angel. A crowd of woman in heaven? A host of Angels. And all woman in heaven? PEACE ON EARTH!

Girl: I wanna a responsible man as a husband. Man replies: Dat’s me, whenever anyone is pregnant in my neighborhood, they say I m responsible!

Friend: how many women do u believe must a man marry? Mr. Bean: 16 Friend: Why? Mr. Bean: Coz the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4 worse.

Psychiatrist’ s receptionist comes & says There’s a man out who says he can make himself invisible. Psychiatrist: “Tell him I can’t see him right now.”

There’s only one perfect child in the world & every mother has it. There’s only one perfect wife in the world & every neighbor has it!

Three dreams of a man: To be as handsome as his mother thinks To be as rich as his child believes To have as many women as his wife suspects..

Women are like blue jeans, They look good for a while but eventually they fade and have to be replaced.

If u r stressed, you’ll get pimples.. if u cry,u’ll get wrinkles.. So, y don’t u smile & get dimples?

There are many things in ur life which will catch ur eye but only few will catch ur heart pursue those

One day a fisherman got up very early in the morning.
There was not enough sunlight to get into the sea. He saw a pack of stones to pass time.
He started throwing the stone into the sea.

While having the last stone in the hand, the sun came up then he saw that the stone was a diamond and all the stones he threw were diamonds as well.

He felt for his misfortune of throwing all of them into the sea…

Moral of the story: Below
************ *************

Never get up early in the morning!!!

Teacher: History is a very interesting subject. It tells you
about what had happened in the past.
Student: Please teacher, I don’t think I want to study history.
Teacher: Why?
Student: There is no future in it.

Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have?
Ted: $10.
Teacher: You don’t know maths.
Ted: You don’t know my father!

Mother: David, come here.
David: Yes, mum?
Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David: But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother: I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now.

Father: Why did you fail your mathematics test?
Son: On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8
Father: So?
Son: On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8 and on Wednesday she said 6+2=8. If she can’t make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?

A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father.
Daughter: It’s mummy!
Father: How do you know?
Daughter: She didn’t say anything.

Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy: No, mine is undying love

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: As old as me
Man: How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born

Waiter: I’ve stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog’s leg.
Customer: Don’t tell me your problems. Give me the menu card.

Teacher: Simon, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did u copy his?
Simon: No, teacher, it’s the same dog!

Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That’s why I say she’s no good!

Teacher: “Where were you born?”
Student: ” Singapore , Sir.”
Teacher: “Which part?”
Student: “All of me, Sir.”

A teacher was asking her class: “What is the difference
between ‘unlawful’ and ‘illegal’?” Only one hand shot up.
“Ok, answer, Joan” said the teacher.
“Unlawful’ is when u do something the law doesn’t allow and ‘illegal’

It is a sick eagle.”

Teacher: “How come you do not comb your hair?”
Ah Kow: “No comb, Sir.”
Teacher: “Use your dad’s then.”
Ah Kow: “No hair, Sir.”

A boy came home from school with his exam results.
“What did u get?” asked his father.
“My marks are under water,” said the boy.
“What do u mean ‘under water’?”
“They are all below ‘C’ level”

Ne oru penkuttiye snehickumpol orkkuka.. avalk oru ammayundu, avalk vendi jeevickunna oru achanundu, avale jeevanu tulyam snehickunna aangalamarund.. Ivareyellam vanchichit aval ninne snehichal ne urappickuka avalk aareyum aadmartamai snehickan kazhiyilla.. Varshangalai avale snehickunnavare avalk vanchickamenkil innale kanda ninneyum aval vanchickum.. Its not a sms, its reality..By
ALL KERALA LOVERS WELFARE ASSOCIATION

Gud Frnds shud b like 2 zeros..
Wen u try 2 add they r same,
wen u subtract they r again same.
Bt wen u try 2 divide they r “indivisible..”

Wen heart starts beating for sumbody,
U would feel every beat as precious.
Bt wen tat sumbody vanishes frm ur life u ll feel every beat as pain..!
Gud mrg.

One who wins in love,wins the
life.
But,one who fails in love,can win the world.
- WILLIAM SHAKESPHERE.

Love Equation
SmartBoy + Smart Girl=Romance
FoolishBoy+ Smart Girl=Empty Pocket
Foolish Boy+ Foolish Girl=Marriage
Smart Boy+ Foolish Girl =pregnent

Keeping sum1 n ur heart z easy…Bt 2 b in sum1s heart z nt dat simple…So respect nd consdr da heart which luvz u.

Fraud with Innocent Boys
Fun with Handsome Boys
Friendship with Charming Boys
Contact with Intelligent Boys
Flirt with Freaky Boys
Love with Faithful Boys
and in the end
Marriage with the Rich Boy!

Friends, please let me know what you think about the Psychology of Girls mentioned above. Do you think it’s True or False. Please post your opinion in the comments. Thanks

Enough of Sardar jokes……………..Mallu jokes are here !

1) What is the tax on a Mallu’s income called? IngumDax

2) Where did the Malayali study? In the ko-liage.

3) Why did the Malayali not go to ko-liage today? He is very bissi.

4) Why did the Malayali buy an air-ticket? To go to Thuubai, zimbly to meet his ungle in Gelff.

5) Why do Malayalis go to the Gelff? To yearn meney.
6) What did the Malayali do when the plane caught fire? He zimbly jembd out of the vindow.

7) How does a Malayali spell moon? MOON – Yem Woh yet another Woh and Yen

Cool What is Malayali management graduate called? Yem Bee Yae.

9) What does a Malayali do when he goes to America ? He changes his name from Karunakaran to Kevin Curren.

10) What does a Malayali use to commute to office everyday? An Oto

11) Where does he pray? In a Temble, Charch and a Maask

12) Who is Bruce Lee’s best friend ? A Malaya-Lee of coarse.

13) Name the only part of the werld, where Malayalis dont werk hard? Kerala.

14) Why is industrial productivity so low in Kerala? Because 86% of the shift time is spent on lifting, folding and re-tying the lungi

15) Why did Saddam Hussain attack Kuwait? He had a Mallu baby-sitter, who always used to say ‘KEEP QUWAIT’ ‘KEEP QUWAIT’

16) What is the Latest Malayali Punch Line? ” Frem Tea Shops To Koll Cenders , We Are Yevery Where ”

17) Why aren’t Mals included in hockey and football teams ? Coz Whenever they get a corner , they set up a tea shop.

18) Now pass it on to 5 Mals to get a free sample of kokanet oil.

19) Pass it on 10 Mals to get a free pack of Benana Chibbs.

20) Pass it on to 15 Mals to get a set of BROGUN bones….