Funny SMS

appooppan : “mone vandi kayaran evide nilkanam”
Tintumon : “aa roadinte nadukkottu ninna mathi, vandi thanne kerikkolum”
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Tintumon : “Ente valyachanu marikkunnathinu munpu marana theeyathi ariyaamayirunnu”
Friend : “valyachan jyothsyan aayirunno?”
Tintumon : “alla , judgi paranju koduthirunnu”
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Govt. Hospitalil admittaaya tintumonodu doctor: Engane undu ividam??
Tintumon: Onnum parayanda ente doctore… Moottakal kadichu pidichillayirunnenkil kothukukal enneyum kondu poyene.
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tintuvum bharyayum markketil poyi avide vech
1 Lady : Hai tintu
Bharya : Avlaraa.
Tintu : Branthu pidippikkalee..”nale avlum Chodikkum Nee aranennu
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teacher : EEYIDE Vamsha Nasham sambavicha Oru Vanya Jeeviyude Peru Paryoo
Tintumon: “Tamizh Puli”
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Teacher: karandu poyal veettil adyam kathikkuka vilakko mezheku thiriyo?…
Tintumon:”Randumalla Theepetti Kolli.”
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Teacher : 5+3 etraya?
Tintumon : enik ariyilla teacher
Teacher : mandaa 5+3=8 anennu arinju koode…
Tintumon : nee alledee innale paranjathu 4+4=8 anennu, ennit..
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Bayam than Tholvikku Mukkiya Kaaranam..!
Athanala, Inimel Kannaadi Munnaadi Pogaathinga..!

Where’s Sukhna Lake?
Pappu: Pata nahi.
Santa: Kabhi ghar se bhi nikla karo.
Pappu: Who’s Banta?
Santa: Pata nai.
Pappu: Kabhi ghar me bhi raha karo.

Santa: Bhaisahab time kya hua?
Man: Sham ke 6 baje hain!
Santa: Sala, subah se pooch raha hoon, sab alag alag time bata rahe hain.

Preeto: Raat ko aap peeke gutter mein gir gaye the.
Banta: Kya bataoon, sub galat sangati ka asar hai, hum 4 dost… 1 bottle, aur woh teeno kambhakt peeten nahin.

Nurse: Congrats Santa ji, aap papa ban gaye.
Santa: Meri wife ko nahi bolna mein use surprise dunga!

Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said ‘Switched Off’!”
Banta : Nahi Pape, it’s my HELLO TUNE!

Daku Mangal Singh Banta Ke Ghar Mein Ghu Ayaa..
Daku : Sona kahan hai, Jaldi Bataao..!
Banta : Pura Ghar Khali Hai Malko, Jithe Marzi So Jao!

Santa : Kaisi Sabzi Banai Hai, Bilkul Gobar Jaisa Swad Hai !
Jasmeet : Hey bhagwan! Na Jane Inhone Kya-Kya Kha Ke Dekha Hua Hai.
Gobar Ka Swad Bhi Pata Hai..!

Banta : Praji, Jab Main Paida Hua Tha To Military Walon Ne 21 Topein
Chalayeen Thi.
Santa : Kamaal Hai ! Sab Ka Nishana Kayse Chook Gaya..?
S

Rajini: Sivaji, MGR, Geminiganesan, Nagesh… .

Vijaykanth: Dharmapuri, Masala poori, Chola poori , Pani poori..

Arya: Vattaram, Muconam, Chathurangam. .

Vijay: Sachin, Dravid, Kumble, Dhoni..

Surya: 6, 7,8 ,9 ..

Jeeva: E, Erumbu, Kosu, Kambilipoochi. ..

SharathKumar: Thalaimagan, Chithappamagan, Athaimagan, Marumagan..

Ajith: Varalaru, Areviyal, Kanakku, English.

Kamal: Vetaiyadu Vilayadu, Kabadi Vilayadu, Olinju Vilayadu..

1. Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other.

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2. Love Affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a 5 day test match.

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3. Marriage: It’s an agreement in which the man loses his bachelor’s degree and the woman gains her master’s.

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4. Divorce: Future tense of marriage.

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5. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through “the minds of either”.

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6. Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

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7. Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in? such a way that everybody believes, she got the biggest piece.

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8. Tears: The hydraulic force by which the masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power.

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9. Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage and success before work.

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10. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everyone disagrees later on.

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11. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

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12. Classic: A book which people praise but do not read.

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13. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

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14. Office: A place where you can relax from the strenuous home life.

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15. Yawn: The only time some married men get to open their mouth.

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16. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

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17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

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18. Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

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19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.